Thursday, January 19, 2006

Jenny Craig eat your heart out

Put on too much weight over Christmas? Want to shed a few kilos?

You have heard of the South Beach Diet – now from Sydney, Australia we bring you the “Long Bay Diet”. Robert Cole, unemployed of NSW, managed to loose 14kg of his unwanted flab while serving time in one of the country’s finest Maximum Security jails. He didn’t use points or a special exercise plan to do this, he signed up to our new Long Bay Diet special incentive scheme.

With the help of our "new free self" coordinator, Cole managed to chip away at a crack in the wall and with time and a little starvation managed to escape through the crack between the bars and the brickwork.

This diet does not only reduce you to a shadow of your former self, but improves brain power and ingenuity!

Don’t delay! Call us today on 1800ESCAPENOW.

8 Comments:

Blogger NDSKYZE said...

of course hes unemployed u dumb bitch he was in jail dumbass

1:31 pm  
Blogger muse said...

Is this diet vegetarian-friendly? *thinking about losing some flab too* LOL

P.S. Pointedly ignoring the uncouth comment posted prior to mine.

2:54 pm  
Blogger Another Outspoken Female said...

Muse - I think irony is wasted on Youth :)

3:21 pm  
Blogger muse said...

Hey, I'm _still_ young! I'm "hip"! I'm "with it"! *chuckles*

3:33 pm  
Blogger R H said...

This reminds me of being in the can and having to do organised track and field. A few of us were reluctant to do it until the screw person who was a German said, "Listen!- zis vill get you so fit you'll be able to outrun ze cops!"
It was the joke that won us over.

Yes well I've done time.
But I don't blame you for it.

Funny posting.

5:15 pm  
Blogger Chai said...

Obviously a criminal mastermind.

12:08 am  
Blogger Another Outspoken Female said...

Update: Our slimmer of the year has been captured. I guess this now qualifies him for the title of "The Biggest Loser".

1:33 pm  
Blogger Justine said...

Ha! That's funny.

ndskyze was serious??! OMG!

9:12 am  

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